Crosspoint Church | Georgetown, TX

Are you having sex?

Today’s devotion builds on the thoughts from Sunday’s Sermon – Week 3 of “Fan or Follower – Practice Purity”  (LISTEN HERE).


Hebrews 13:4 Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral.

Years ago I was privileged to have a few seminary students as interns at the church I served.  Part of this year was to provide experiences that exposed the student to different ministry situations.  One such occasion allowed the intern to sit in on premarriage counseling sessions with a couple that had asked me to do their wedding.

Whenever a couple comes to me and asks me to do their wedding, I am up front with them and say, “You are coming to me because you want to honor God with your wedding, your marriage and your relationship.”  So one of the sessions we talk about honoring God with the gift of sex.  So in this session, I bluntly asked the couple, “Are you having sex?”

The intern almost fell off his chair.  Red cheeks on the couple and an intern a bit startled provided the setting for encouragement about the use of sex as God designed it, in the context of a committed, married relationship.

Readers, you may not find yourself in a pre-marriage counseling session, and It may be awkward at times to have conversations about this with someone, but let the truth from Hebrews 13:4 resonate in your heart.

Marriage should be honored by all and the marriage bed kept pure.  

Sex is for marriage. Period.

Our society uses sex as entertainment, self-gratification, and a way to gain friends or a following online.  All are sexual immorality.

Couples live together before they are married and justify having sex as they are “consenting adults.”  For those that aren’t married, living together, or considering living together before marriage, let me offer some research on what marriage looks like after cohabitating.

“There is a 20% chance of a first marriage resulting in divorce within five years. In comparison, couples who cohabit for five years have a 49% chance of separating. Similarly, married couples have a 33% chance of divorce within 10 years, whilst cohabiting couples have a 62% chance of splitting up in this timeframe. These statistics indicate that married couples are likely to remain together longer than couples who choose to cohabit but do not marry.” https://hackspirit.com/infidelity-statistics/#What_do_the_numbers_say

What is the point of sharing all this?  Emotionally, relationally, spiritually, God’s direction about sex is the best way.  He designed men and women biologically to have and enjoy the sexual relationship.  However, it’s not just about the biology, it is also about sharing an emotional and spiritual companionship with your spouse.  One-night stands, uncommitted living together, or hook ups disregard the full physical, emotional, and spiritual intimacy that God designed for a married couple to foster and enjoy.  Sex is a gift.  It’s a wonderful part of a marriage.  Enjoy it, guilt free, disease free, emotionally free in the context of your marriage.

If you are unmarried, wait.  Don’t give your body to a person who will walk out the next morning.  Don’t sell yourself to pleasure another selfish person.  You are valuable and honorable.  Don’t degrade yourself to the sinful pleasures of another.  

Perhaps not the way you were expecting to begin your day!  However, as with all the teaching and direction God gives, he gives them for our blessing and enjoyment of life.  Keep the marriage bed pure and honor God with your bodies.

Apply: What is one way you can honor the Lord’s design for sex and marriage?

Prayer: Lord, thank you for all the blessings you give, including the gift of sex.  Give me strength to overcome temptations to improperly use this gift.  As you gift me with a spouse, may we enjoy this gift together.  As I wait for the gift of a spouse, lead me to honor you and my body by not giving in to temptation that diminishes or degrades the gift of sex.  AMEN.

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